Harnessing the Potential of Self-Doubt

Think of someone you admire. It could be a world-changing activist, an artistic genius, or a titan of industry. We often imagine these kinds of people exist on a plane above the rest of us, possessing talents and capacities that let them transform reality by sheer force of will.

But regardless of the hero you named, I can guarantee they’ve experienced their own moments of profound insecurity.​ ​In tough situations, we often become tough on ourselves. Our culture doesn’t create space for so-called unpleasant feelings, so we often suffer through these moments silently and alone. We wonder why we feel so incompetent when it seems as though everyone else has their lives under control.

​Recognize that self-doubt is neither an unchangeable truth nor something you should ignore, and it’s usually not an isolated feeling.

It’s connected to what we value: if we doubt our ability to give an important presentation, it could be because we value being a skilled employee and want to do high-quality work. If we doubt a parenting decision we’ve made, it’s likely because we value our child’s wellbeing and want to raise them as best we can.

No one feels confident and courageous all the time. Here are some tips for harnessing the power of self-doubt:

• Recognize that doubting yourself is a completely normal experience. Acknowledge your anxieties and fears without letting them paralyze you.
• Identify which value lies beneath your insecurity. What are you worried you’re not going to “live up to”?
• What is one values-aligned step you can take at this time? How can you live into your values?
• Be kind to yourself (this can be difficult!). With practice and reflection, our self-compassion can be a powerful tool. Sometimes it’s hard work to be kind, especially to ourselves.

Just as our uncomfortable feelings are signposts leading us in the direction of our values, our self-doubt often signifies that we care deeply about something. When we meet our self-doubt with compassion and curiosity, it can guide us toward a greater clarity of purpose and help us make the right decisions. We all have moments of insecurity, but rather than shrink from a challenge we’re afraid we won’t live up to, we can reconnect with the values we can live into instead.